sesame street

i come before you today full of inspiration. and i'm not even being sarcastic like i usually am. there is something about today that is beautiful, and something about today that gives me hope. there is something about tomorrow that is exciting, and something about yesterday that doesn't matter. there is something about this moment that i'm in right now. i can't explain it. i don't even want to. i just want to hold on, but the moment i hold on too tight i will lose it. so i'll just relax and let it happen.

this is far from the usual circumstance for me. i am hard to please on the best of days. just ask my wife. take my wife, please. how did that joke become funny? but for some reason i feel this new sense of wonder at everything around me. i am aware for the first time in a while of my surroundings. i have found that when i am unaware of what is going on around me, it is impossible to stay content. and i don't mean aware, like, aware of the current issues facing us in the world today. i mean really aware. seeing with eyes that look below the surface. i think Jesus talked about that somewhere at some point. i'm a pastor, i should know, but i don't want to take the time to look it up. looking at a flower and seeing it for what it is. one of the most beautiful things this earth has to offer. i don't care if that sounds gay or hippy. you can call me both if you want. watching the grass over the past few weeks has caught my attention. something about it going from lifeless, dead, and brown to long and luscious green is just beautiful (until i have to pull out the lawnmower and step in dog poo). someone i know told me the other day they want to be baptized. i have never really been all for the the baptisms. not that i am anti-baptism, just that sometimes i am so cynical it is hard for me to get into the hymn singing and hand holding. but i went to one the other week, and it got me hungry. it got me hungry to see people know God. in a real way. not in the way i have pretended for most of my life. so my friend is getting baptized in a couple weeks, and i can't wait for the rest of her life. i am anxious to see her not waste away like i have for so long. life is beautiful. that's all there is to it. the problem with someone in my state of mind is that you can argue with me all you want, and i don't care. cause today is what today is, and neither my positivity nor the negativity i will probably have again tomorrow will change the world. the only thing that will change the world is seeing. really seeing. deeper than the surface.

this program was brought to you today by the sentence 'none of that made sense' and the number 3.