moments

the music makes me smile,
but something says it won't last.
the name on the phone tells me the moment has come.
the tears tell me what i don't want to believe.
speechless, broken, afraid, desperate.

on the longest road i've traveled
small talk and cheap laughs
hold us close together at this moment.
and i know the mask must come off soon.
the road brings me closer to my greatest fear.

the fear of being alone.

cigarettes and tears
were never meant for each other,
but they are all that sustains in this moment.
the excruciating, the dreadful, the unfamiliar,
and through it all we know there's a light.

we just can't see it yet.
so we will continue searching,
fumbling in this dark corner for something real.
when it will all make sense.
will we ever find that moment? when?