the end of MEANS

on friday, a piece of me will die. something that has been so significant in my growth as an individual will not be there for me to lean on. MEANS is calling it quits after 7 years. so many memories.

playing MXPX cover songs and teenage supermodel in the common room at wcc, my eyes transfixed on my bass guitar for fear of missing a note. 20 of our best friends in the world shouting their support, regardless of how lame we were. pushing boundaries that now seem ridiculous. fighting for our right to play. my brother pete, our biggest fan. our first official show. 341 productions presentation with OE, 71 Gaps (jess, james and derek), Neighborhood Watch and MEANS2ANEND! the excitement. the possibility. the clash with DRCSS. making friends with DRCSS. flyers on windshields followed by complaints. allied arts center. old fire hall. western's auditorium. student center. a new and growing music scene. jamming in the basement of mom's house, aaron's mom's house, the dorm. stupid trains pissing me off at 7 in the morning, thanks a lot jess. coffee with derek and jess. watching movies with aaron, "KUNG POW 4 LIFE!." thanks ben for making fun of how much butter i put in kraft dinner. pancakes the next morning. bringing Every New Day & Goodsampark to dauphin. recording in the barn with derek. recording in russell at a goofy guys house. recording in redvers. "if anyone thinks he is something...", in my pre-pubescent voice. recording with kelly martin and becoming george bush's wet dream. the last dauphin show before we moved to regina. the small town feel and music that brought us together.

road trips to winnipeg with dave, the shell gas guy. road trips to regina with supportive friends and shows with only 10 people. road trip to providence, thanks for the snow storm eder. crappy winnipeg church shows, no offense winnipeg. grafton, ND with H and Dead Poetic. not to mention eating gravy and ketchup on bread with jeff h. borrowing mom's station wagon. driving miss judy. road trips. where i found myself. where i found friendship. where i had the best conversations. where i heard the funniest jokes. al pacino? aaron, will you ever drive? jamming with goodsampark, best friends in the world, jeremy, kris, peter and ricky. new places. fresh faces. buffalo lounge, the best venue ever. moose jaw, what's with all the dead animals on the wall? ontario trip that almost ruined my friendship, i was such an a-hole, sorry about that aaron! staying in carlyle, thanks for letting me raid your fridge, shelby! playing the tuba at 4 am. dragging my beautiful wife to see shows she could care less about, but loved me enough to support me. the excitement of new songs and new directions. moving to regina. new scene and new challenges. new friends. too many to name.

parting ways to start my family. the hardest thing i've ever had to do. i am sincerely thankful that dylan and todd helped means live on a few years longer.

music saved my life. MEANS saved my life. i am thankful to have been a part of this.

as lame as it gets

beautiful moments

the last 3 days have given me one of the greatest memories i will ever have.

the last couple days, my beautiful daughter, Makena, has ended up sleeping in our bed. she's had a couple nightmares, and it seems to calm her down. the last three mornings have gone like this...

i wake up and see my beautiful little girl next to me. and i can't seem to fall back asleep, because i just can't take my eyes off of her. soon after, she slowly starts to wake up, but she rolls close and cuddles up to me. she likes to put her hand on my cheek to make sure my face is right in front of hers. then she slowly closes her eyes, and rests knowing she is safe with me. and i can't quit staring. so i tuck her in again to keep her warm and i get about 10 minutes of quiet just resting with my beautiful little girl. then out of nowhere, with her eyes still closed, she starts talking a mile a minute about dora and princesses and ponies. her eyes open up and a smile creeps onto her cute little face. then she leans over and gives me a big hug and crawls out of bed.

December 1st will mark Makena's third birthday. i can't believe how fast she has grown up. she has the beauty of her mother and the attitude of her father, which is scary in more ways than one. but for now, i will hold on to these moments she has given me, and i will never forget how special my little girl is to me. happy birthday, Makena Grace!

post 2 of 2-read last post before this

i am getting very tired of this sentiment. luckily, i think most christians are changing their views on caring for the environment. there was a time not long ago where most christians would tell you that the world will end one day so why bother caring for her?

these people are so misguided it makes me sick. that may sound arrogant, and if so, then i apologize for my arrogance. but i will not apologize for confronting the idiocy that says we can use, destroy, and waste the world's resources because..."God gave us the earth, so we might as well." and don't forget the ever popular, 'the sooner the world falls apart, the sooner Jesus will come back!"

i am glad christians are beginning to stand up for the planet God gave us to care for. while we were given the earth to rule over, these people are forgetting what that kind of leadership looks like. God gave us the earth to rule over it, in the same way that he rules over us. at youth group last night, we read matthew 20:20-28, and while Jesus is not speaking about the environment, i think we can glean the same principle for this topic. the rulers of the Gentiles lord their authority over them, but that is not how followers of Jesus are to be. we are to be a different set of rulers. we are to be rulers like Jesus. we are to care for creation, in the same way that we believe God cares for his creation, us.

the topic of climate change has sort of fallen into the background with the faltering economy, but it is my sincere hope that followers of Christ will never stop caring for the world that has been entrusted to us. i am a hypocrite in many ways, as i don't recycle all the time, and am very wasteful at times. but i am trying to change for the better. and i pray that the church will do this as well.

post 1 of 2-i hesitate to even share this...

This a letter one of the students at OC sent to the editor of the schools newspaper...

Letter to the Editor
By Special to Opinions

By: Drew Sandlin

I recently received an email asking me to fill out a survey evaluating the campus recycling program. I generally discard emails of this nature, and as I was doing so a thought occurred to me: “Why are we so concerned about recycling or how green our campus is?”

Over the past few weeks, there’s been some hubbub over how environmentally friendly our campus is, and how much energy each student here uses. To be quite honest, I find it a bit disturbing.

I don’t know if we’ve thought about consulting God’s word on this subject, but it has some interesting things to say about our relationship with the earth. Since God created it, it’s only fair to see what he planned for us to do with it.

In Genesis chapter 1:26, God clearly puts man in charge of the earth: “…and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth.”

If God gave us rule over the earth, there is absolutely no need to “save” anything.

I find this whole “Green” movement dangerously secular in nature. Romans 1:25 reads: “They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator.”

I wonder how many students at Oklahoma Christian University feel a greater obligation to the doctrine of “recycling” or “save the earth” than they do to the doctrine of baptism? I hope that they are few and far between.

The fact of the matter is this, and this simply: this earth is just a temporary house that we humans will live in for a little while until God burns it all up. There is no point in trying to save it.

I realize that all of this is terribly politically incorrect. To be fair, recycling, if it is cost effective and done to keep our campus clean or to make a few dollars here and there for a good cause, is not a bad thing.

I’m not trying to say that it’s okay to litter, and that picking up trash on the ground is a sin. It becomes a bad thing when we let it eclipse the real work that God has put us here to do.

We need to stop trying to “save the planet” and start worshipping the God that created it. Can you imagine how much more effective we as Christians could be if we stopped wasting our time trying to be “green” and started doing some real work for God?

Why not take the resources that are being used to see how “green” our campus is through surveys and polls and allocate them for the Wishing Well program? I can think of many other ways to use our time and resources in a better fashion.

I hope that we haven’t forgotten what our real purpose here on earth is. It’s not making sure that there isn’t a pop can lying on the ground around the corner. And it’s most certainly not the saving of trees; it’s the saving of souls.

We need to get out there and do some purposeful work in this life; something that we can be proud of when we stand before God on Judgment Day.

God cares more about the lost than he does about the 2% rise in carbon emissions last year.
Let us never forget that. I hope that we will never, ever be found guilty of exchanging the truth of God for a lie.

famous quotes

most christian parents brag about their child's first prayer, or the first time their child understood who God is...
from the mouth of makena grace...

a few months ago...

missy asks, "Makena, can you say, 'I love Jesus?'"
makena's response..."I LOVE CHOCOLATE!"

and tonight...

"Makena, can we pray to Jesus before bed?"
after about 10 seconds of careful thought and consideration in a calm and polite voice...
"...no...no."

some youth minister i am. my own child is an atheist. or maybe agnostic.

In Remembrance...

as someone who is outspoken against war, today brings mixed emotions for me.

i used to be more judgmental in my criticisms of this day because i figured that anyone who celebrated it was pro-war. i realize now that the world is not so black and white. today is a day to remember. with my limited years, i have only seen canadians involved in one war, afghanistan. but today, watching men and women who fought in afghanistan, men and women who participated in peace keeping missions around the world, those who fought in korea, men who fought in WW2, and the one remaining 108 year old man who fought in WW1, i felt a deep sorrow for those who have lost their lives. men and women, who lost their lives fighting for something they believed in. fighting for something bigger than themselves. fighting for their children. fighting for me, and for my children.

we can debate all we want whether or not a war is just. i still believe that war is not the answer to the world's problems, and i still believe we need to have those debates. but i can no longer discount the men and women who have given their lives for something they believed in. and even when they don't believe in the war or the politicians that started it, they still willingly step into the line of fire for a cause greater than themselves. that is more than i have ever done in my life. and because they are willing to do that, i am grateful. and i will honor them, regardless of my political & religious beliefs. today, i will remember.

a new day

while i would never admit to watching her show...cough, cough...i think Oprah said it best.

"It feels like hope won. It feels like there's a shift in consciousness. It feels like something really big and bold has happened here, like nothing ever in our lifetimes did we expect this to happen."

something big has happened. we don't know all the implications of this yet. but hope has won. a new day has arrived. people can start to believe again. americans can believe their president will listen to them once more. americans can believe their president will fight for them, and not just in wars across the world, but in their cities and towns. americans can believe in something again. it's been so long since anyone has been able to believe in a politician. i am only 25, but looking back over history, there have been few times where this kind of hope has been laid in the hands of someone. there has been little to be grateful for in american politics these past 8 years. and i stress the word little. and hope almost faded. it was barely holding on. but Barack Obama has grabbed a hold of that hope, and shared it with the world. 8 years has felt like a life time, but it's finally here.

it's not just americans who are excited. the world is excited. the world is excited for intelligence and reason and morality to once again be a part of the american superpower. and while i'm not american, this hope has reached across the imaginary line that is our border and swept me off my feet. belief in our leaders has become a rare commodity. it is so rare that the entire world has grabbed a hold of this man from chicago. i don't think Barack Obama is the savior of the world. but i do believe he will make this world a better place. i believe he will stand up for the oppressed, and not just when there is oil involved. i believe he will stand up for the poor. i believe he will narrow the gap between rich and poor. i believe in him. i've never been able to say that about a politician before. but i really do. and i am so glad america has chosen him. it is a new day for the world. and i am thankful.

i hope my daughter will be like this

thanks strakers for sharing.

a historic day

the problem with 24 hour news networks is they have taken the steam out of the most historic presidential campaign in many, many years. after 2 years of 24 hour coverage on candidates, flag pins, vague associations, women crying, stupid comments, and talking points beat to death, we are finally here. it is finally the day that the world will change. as a canadian, it hurts the pride a little bit to admit that america affects so much of the world, but that is reality. whoever wins today will set the world on a new path. i don't believe a political leader will save the world from the mess we have made of it, but i do believe they can help. it is exciting to have an opportunity to see someone make real impacting change for the betterment of the world. unfortunately, it's been 8 years since we have had that happen. i'm so glad that today will signal a new era. what if we could start respecting our politicians again? what if we could believe the things they tell us? what if... i can't help but wonder. and i can't help but be excited for the future.

although, late night talk shows won't have as much material to work with once Bush-league isn't president anymore.

a present from my uncle scott

25 is the new 20

whatever that means.
i turned 25 yesterday. it was an awesome day. minimal work load+trick or treating+a nice dinner from my wife=me like. i don't know why but 25 feels so much older than 24. not like i actually feel the age. just the sound of 25. 25 feels like adult. 24 felt like young adult. maybe it's because i lost my young adult discount at the gym, but my age is catching up to me. i'm very happy. this isn't a complaint. just an observation.

when i was 24, it felt normal to stay up until 3 in the morning to watch movies once in a while. now, i feel like my ulcer will explode if i'm up past midnight. when i was 24, i felt like i could drive all night to go to a concert and turn around and come back the next morning. now, that sounds like crazy talk, as i'm trying to plan trips to see MEANS on their last tour, i am getting tired just thinking about it. i realized that no matter what, i can't sleep past 9. so going to bed early is becoming increasingly valuable to me. anybody notice anything in common with those three observations? they all have to do with sleep. and every year, i have slowly cut back on the amount i've stayed up late or out all night. 25 years old feels like sleep has become more valuable. maybe it's as simple as that. i'm a cranky old coot now, so you better watch it if i miss my afternoon nap. i suppose i'm not like most 25 year olds. married with 2 kids. most of my friends think i'm nuts, except the ones in the same boat as me. i am nuts. i'm nuts about my beautiful kids. and i'm nuts about my beautiful wife. i love regina, and i'm crazy about my job. i've never been happier when i think about it. i complain too much. is it true that the older you get, the more you ponder? because i've been pondering since yesterday, and i realize i need to be happy. i have no reason not to be. in the midst of all the pain and suffering of the world, my life is fitting together beautifully. so why complain? because i'm spoiled. that's the only reason i do it. so i'm going to try and stop. if you read this, and the next time i see you, i'm complaining, slap me right across the mouth. be careful, though, because my beard is bristly. life is good. it's nice to be 25. i think part of getting older is being honest with yourself. i'll never be in the nba. i'll never beat expert on guitar hero. and i'll never win the lottery. and that's okay. i'm happy. genuinely happy. being an old fart is better than i used to make it out to be.